Authorities have dug up some very incriminating evidence and expect to unearth all the Dirt on this one real soon. The suspect is currently holed up somewhere on campus. U of Milo campus security expect that he can't stay in the underground forever and when he comes out he'll have no choice but to spill his guts.

Head of campus security Bob MacMillan says he has 22 good reasons why he knows this hole incident will soon be blown away.

Shuttle scientist suffers fall, loses memory

The Milo Astronuts Space Academy ( MASA ) suffered a set-back recently when one of their top scientists fell off his desk while attempting to demonstrate no-hands beer pouring techniques.

Unfortunately he now has a Beer can fused to his forehead and cannot remember the recipe for MASA special ethanol blend that we use to fuel our shuttle and our crew at the send-off party. "We sure hope fuzzy gets better real soon, or at least before we totally run out of fuel"

Some very graphic pictures of the incident are attached below. If you have a weak stomach, please do not view these pictures. And please do not try this at home, this is something that only trained professionals can do after years of hard practice.